Part 2

Warning: Sperm is mentioned several times in this part. *giggle* Please try to control yourselves. *snicker*

As we forged further into the dark woods, a faint clicking could be heard.

“What is that sound?”

“What sound?”

“That sound! It sounds like something’s clicking. Can’t you hear it?”

“Oh, that sound! That’s my teeth chattering. I’m freezing! Why are we out here at night, anyway?”

“Don’t now, I’ll have to ask. If you’re cold, why didn’t you ask for your jacket back?” I asked. Darien was sweet enough to give me his jacket earlier, I was telling him about Butch and I shivered. He thought it meant that I was cold. But he didn’t exactly ask if I was cold, just draped his jacket over my shoulders and rubbed my arms. I might not have been cold, but I wasn’t complaining either!

“No, that’s okay! I wouldn’t want you to freeze on my account!” Chivalrous to the end, ain’t he? Of course, I am the one wearing a tank top and shorts and he is wearing blue jeans and a dark blue long-sleeved silk shirt. Silk?

“Actually, I’m kinda warm. Here.” I wrap his jacket around his shoulders and help him into it, as his shivering made it a little difficult for him. After zipping up his jacket, with a grimace on my face, I took his freezing hands into mine to warm them.

“Thanks.” He said rather sheepishly. I couldn’t help but grin.

“No problem! But your hands are still freezing. Maybe you should put them somewhere warmer.” He blushed. I chuckled.

“I meant like your arm pits, silly!”

“Oh. I mean . . . I wasn’t really thinking . . . that you meant . . .” He flustered and blushed an even deeper shade of red. I cracked up. I was laughing so hard, I had to lean on him for support. This caused him to stop talking altogether. The commotion I was causing got our counselor’s unwanted attention.

“What the hell is going on here?” she demanded. Darien was still speachless and I was trying to breathe, and when I did manage to get a breath, I would only laugh again, so she wasn’t getting an answer anytime soon.

“Well? What’s so damn funny?” she said after five minutes of waiting. By this time, I was on the ground exhausted with a smile perma-fixed to my face, or so it seemed.

“We, uh, we were just wondering why we’re out here at night.” Darien managed to say.

“If you don’t know, why are you here?” she asked, still not seeing how that had to do with why I was laughing so hard.

“Well, we say a group of people that looked like they were about to have fun and decided to join in!” I said. Still grinning ear to ear, I used Darien to climb my way back into a standing position.

“We are out here to see the night blooming flowers in the valley. It’s quite a sight!” Catherine so kindly informed us.

“Ooh, goody! But, um, I’ve been to the valley before and, shouldn’t we be there by now? Normally, it’s a 15 minute hike and we’ve been walking for at least 45.”

“Well, um . . .” She said sheepishly.

“We’re lost, aren’t we?” She nodded.

“Do the others know?”

“Not yet. I keep hoping I’d stumble across the right path, but so far . . .”

“Damnit! This is just great!” I look up towards the sky to find it blocked by the trees overhead.

“Not even stars to go by! Damnit! How well do you know these woods, Cathy?” I asked.

“I only know the way to the valley and, evidently, not enough to get there in the dark.”

“Then I’d better take the lead. I know these woods better than anybody. I’m sure if we come across something that even vaguely looks familiar to me, I can find our way back. Unless you think you’d have a better chance?”

“Lead the way, I’m right behind you. I’ll tell the others what’s going on and then we’ll regroup and follow your lead.” She turned on her heel and rounded up the other campers.

“Do you really know these woods better than anyone?” Darien asked.

“Hell if I know! But I’m sure I know them better than anyone here.” Catherine came back with the others behind her.

“All right, Captain. Lead the way.” She swept her arm out in front of here in a ‘lead on’ gesture.

“Alrighty then. Flashlight?” She hands me this huge flashlight thingy that wasn’t very bright. I found the switch and turned it off, then back on again. It shone brighter in a narrow beam. I pushed the switch up one more notch, casing the it to go into flood mode, lighting up the area for about fifteen feet.

“Whoa! That certainly helps. Now let’s see . . .” I swept the surrounding area with the light, for an indication as to which way to go. When the light reached the way we had been going in, I though ‘What the hell.’ and headed in the direction. The others were quick to follow. Darien followed close behind me. No one spoke. I stopped, causing Darien to run into me.

“Alright, that’s it! If you guys don’t start talking soon, I’m going to go crazy!” I stated without turning around. All at once, they started talking. Apologizing, mostly, others complaining that I should be concentrating on getting back, and not whether or not anyone was talking.

“Aaaah, that’s better! I work better with some background noise!” with that, I continued walking.

“Hey, wait up!” Darien caught up with me, which caused the others to notice my departure and run after me. I didn’t have to tell them to talk again. Hell, I don’t think I could have gotten them to shut up if I tried!

We wandered around like that, me leading, them following, down a vague foot path through he woods for what seemed like eternity. People started complaining and whining for a rest. I knew how they felt, my feet were killing me! I would have stopped already, except there wasn’t a place to rest.

“Just a bit farther and we’ll stop.” I reassured them. Many groans were forth coming. I barely held mine in check. I opted for a sigh instead. ‘Just a little longer and we’ll find a spot to rest. Just a little longer’ I told myself. I sighed again.

“How’re you holding out?” Darien asked, placing his hand on my shoulder. I reached up and squeezed his hand.

“I’m alright. I’ll better once we find a place to stop and rest a bit.” I smiled wanly. He smiled back, giving my shoulder a squeeze.

“Don’t worry, we’re bound to come across a clearing sooner or later.” he said.

“I’d rather it be sooner, as would everyone else!” I chuckled wearily. I sighed once again as I leaned against Darien’s side, as we continued to walk. He wrapped his arm around my shoulders, giving me a reassuring squeeze. I wrapped my arm around his waist and leaned my head against his shoulder. We move fast, don’t we? ;P

Ten more aching feet, and we reached a small clearing, filled with various green plants. No sooner had we gotten there, did people start sighing in relief and plopping down into the surrounding foliage.

“Stop! You don’t know what kind of plants those are!” Catherine yelled, though it was a little late. All but Catherine, Darien, and myself were already relaxing in the greenery. Catherine put her hand up to her face and muttered something about kids these days. I couldn’t help but snicker.

“What did you expect?” I chuckled. Darien was hiding his own smile behind his hand. His belly was shaking from the laughter he was holding in check. ‘My how his eyes sparkle when he laughs.’ I caught myself thinking.

It wasn’t long before some people started scratching various parts of their body, moving from one area to another. Others soon followed. As did the complaints, whining, and ‘What the hell?’s. A collective sigh was heard from the three of us still standing. Apparently, the small clearing was a veritable smorgasbord of poison oak, ivy, sumac, and what have ya’s.

“I don’t suppose you have any . . .”

“Not enough for everyone, I’m afraid.” Catherine cut me off.

“Hey, I think I see a building up ahead.” Darien pointed ahead of us. I pointed the flashlight in the direction he indicated, and sure enough, there appeared to be a building not that far ahead.

“Let’s check it out. Come on, peeps! Get your itchy buts in gear! We’re heading out!” I said, heading in the direction of the slightly obscured building.

“Who put her in charge?” A slightly irked guy complained.

“Catherine, when she got us lost.” The girl next to him retorted.

“I heard that!” Catherine barked.

“Eep!” I couldn’t help but chuckle at this little exchange.

“Never anger the boss-lady, current or otherwise!”

“Damn straight!” Catherine agreed with me. Chuckles were heard from all around, as people lightened up, despite their afflictions.

The building turned out to be an old log hunting lodge. It appeared to have been abandoned for at least ten years, if not longer. When we reached the area in front of the lodge, several things could be heard. Namely people.

“Looks like a hunting lodge.” Catherine said.

“Looks like a log cabin to me.”

“Looks abandoned.”

“Looks old and decrepit.”

“Looks dangerous.”

“Looks scary!”

“Don’t worry, I’ll protect you from anything that might be in there!”

“But who will protect me from you?”

“I will!”

“Oh, *now* I feel safe!”

“Shall we go in?” I asked.

“Maybe only one of us should go in and make sure it safe.” suggested Darien.

“Okie pokie, here ya go!” I said, handing him the flashlight.

“Now wait a minute! I didn’t say it would be me!” Oh, he’s a brave one alright!

“Of course you didn’t! But I’m volunteering you anyway!” I smiled, shoved the light into his hands, pat him on the back, moving him towards the front door. Giving in, he sighed and walked up to the door. Placing his hand on the door knob, he paused momentarily, possibly to pray he’ll make it out alive, before opening the weather worn door. It opened with a loud groan after Darien put all his weight to it. This caused a mountain of dust to rain upon his head. This caused him to cough and sneeze quite a bit before he could continue. This scene bemused several of our companions, that is, until the dust traveled outside, making some sneeze and cough themselves, and irritating others poisoned skin. ‘Serves them right.’ I thought, with a smirk upon my face.

We lost him when he went further into the lodge, only following his movements by his footsteps and the light shed by the flashlight. For some reason, when anyone talked, it was in a whisper, as if afraid to wake something.

“Hey, guys! I found something!” We all jumped three feet into the air when Darien called out. He walked to the door, only to find us all clutching our chests and trying to breathe.

“What’s going on?” I had to hit him.

“Don’t do that!” I yelled at him.

“Ow! Hey, quit hitting me!” he grabbed my hand, the one not still clutching my chest.

“Don’t you know you’re not suppose to yell when it’s freaking quiet?!” I yelled, hitting him with my other hand, which he was quick to grab in self defense. Others started yelling at him themselves at this point.

“Now, everyone calm down!” Catherine took charge. Everyone settled down, but he still received many death glares.

“Alright, then.” catherine then whapped Darien upside the head for causing her a near death experience. Since he was still holding both my hands, he could not defend himself from another attack.

“Ow! Will you people please stop hitting me? I’m sorry, okay?”

“You said you found something. What was it?” Catherine asked.

“Oh, yeah! I found a fully stocked med supply closet! I’m pretty sure there’s something for everyone in there! And the building’s pretty sound, too.”

“Fabulous! Let’s all go in then!” Catherine lead the way into the lodge, Darien and I close behind her. Our fellow campers were a bit wary of coming in, but they started to trickle in, and once it was known that there was furniture still in good condition, they rest quickly found their in, in hopes of claiming a good seat.

Once in, Darien lead the way to the supply closet. It was brimming with medical supplies, more than just first aide. It’s a hunting lodge. Severe accidents are bound to happen! Catherine and I began filling Darien’s arms with supplies. While doing so, Catherine spotted a book on a top shelf titled ‘Poisonous Plants and Cures’. She tried to get the book, figuring it would be helpful, but she was too short to reach.

“Patty, can you get that book for me?”

“Uh, sure, I think I can reach it.” I reached up and was barely able to catch the edge of the book. I started to pull it down, when something fell off of it, along with a ton of dust. I sneezed and pulled the book down quickly. A box decided to come down with it, hitting me on the head and dumping it’s contents on to my forearms. Apparently, the lid to the box fell first. Whatever hit my arms fell of and onto the floor.

“What is that?” Darien asked.

“Looks like some kind of dried plant. I’ve never seen anything like it, though.” Catherine said as she bent down to pick it up.

“Don’t touch it!” I yelled. “It’s poisonous!” Catherine moved back.

“You know what kind of plant it is?” she asked.

“No, but it’s making my arms itch and burn something awful, so I figured it’s poisonous.”
I stated nonchalantly. They look at me as if I had, well lost it. I handed the book to Catherine and walked out the door and to the room everyone else was in.

“Raise your hand if your skin is burning and itching!” I yelled into the room. Almost everyone raised there hand.

“Okay, raise your hand if it’s really intense!” A few people lowered there hands.

“Raise your hand if it feels like your flesh is melting off your bones and thousands of bugs are clawing at your nerve endings!” Everyone lowered their hand.

“Guess it’s just me then.” I said before turning around and going back to the supply closet, leaving a roomfull of stunned people in my wake. When I returned, Catherine was reading the book.

“Do you have pink and blue neon dots on your arms?” Catherine asked me, without looking up.

“Say what?” I walked over to her to see what she was reading that would produce such a question. What I saw was a picture of the plant that had hit me and a brief description. ‘A plant that looks like long stemmed oak leaves growing straight out of the ground, that is a dark shade of green, speckled with bright blue and pink dots.’ Some description. ‘This plant, when touched, causes a strange and unusual rash to appear. Bright blue and pink dots will appear on the affected areas. It also causes a severe itching and burning.’ Okay, now I understand. ‘The rash will not spread from one person to another, however, it will most likely get worse and spread across the body if untreated.’ Great! So how does one treat it? ‘The only known cure is . . .’ Turn the page. ‘. . . sperm. Spread over the affected areas and, also, taken internally. The fresher the sperm is, the faster the rash will heal and the less imitating the symptoms. It is advised, however, that one should not use his own sperm, as it will only make the rash worse.’ Oh, okay.


“We, uh, kinda had the same reaction, too.” Darien said, blushing slightly.

“Doesn’t look like there’s any choice. There’s more than what you just read and it tells exactly what needs to be done. For your arms, we have to mix one part sperm with 2 parts calamine lotion, spread it over the affected areas, and cover them with gauze, leaving them on for 24 hours. But . . . you’ll still need to take some internally. There’s no way around it. I’m sorry.” Cathy said. (I’m getting tired of typing Catherine, so ;p)

“This is just wonderful. And I can’t even spread it to someone else! It ain’t fair!” I mock pouted.

“At least you can make light of this!” she chuckled. “Let’s take of the others first, and then you can pick your donor!” she winked and grabbed some more supplies and headed towards the others, Darien close behind her.

“Exactly how fresh are we talking about, here?” I followed.

“Straight from the, eh, cow, would be best. No offense.”

“None taken.” Darien replied, blushing yet again. The smile on my face would make the Joker envious! ‘He’s just too cute when he blushes!’ I thought.

We reached the main room where everyone was waiting with little ado.

“Alright, boys and girls! Come and get it before it expires!” Cathy bellowed. We handed out bottles of calamine lotion, cotton balls, cotton pads, gauze pads, and what have ya’s to anxious itching hands.

“Now help each other out and we’ll be around to give ya a hand.” Cathy said before moving over to help someone. Darien and I gave each other one last look before wading into the sea of calamine lotion and pathetically helpless human beings.